A room in the Garter Inn.
Enter FALSTAFF and BARDOLPH
FALSTAFF
Bardolph, I say,–
BARDOLPH
Here, sir.
FALSTAFF
Go fetch me a quart of sack; put a toast in't.
Exit BARDOLPH
Have I lived to be carried in a basket, like a
barrow of butcher's offal, and to be thrown in the
Thames? Well, if I be served such another trick,
I'll have my brains ta'en out and buttered, and give
them to a dog for a new-year's gift. The rogues
slighted me into the river with as little remorse as
they would have drowned a blind bitch's puppies,
fifteen i' the litter: and you may know by my size
that I have a kind of alacrity in sinking; if the
bottom were as deep as hell, I should down. I had
been drowned, but that the shore was shelvy and
shallow, –a death that I abhor; for the water swells
a man; and what a thing should I have been when I
had been swelled! I should have been a mountain of mummy.
Re-enter BARDOLPH with sack
BARDOLPH
Here's Mistress Quickly, sir, to speak with you.
FALSTAFF
Let me pour in some sack to the Thames water; for my
belly's as cold as if I had swallowed snowballs for
pills to cool the reins. Call her in.
BARDOLPH
Come in, woman!
Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY
MISTRESS QUICKLY
By your leave; I cry you mercy: give your worship
good morrow.
FALSTAFF
Take away these chalices. Go brew me a pottle of
sack finely.
BARDOLPH
With eggs, sir?