Mrs. Bri. Oh, barbarous! to want a husband that may wed you to-day, and be sent the Lord knows where before night; then in a twelvemonth perhaps to have him come like a Colossus, with one leg at New York, and the other at Chelsea Hospital.
Lau. Then I’ll be his crutch, mamma.
Mrs. Bri. No, give me a husband that knows where his limbs are, though he want the use of them:—and if he should take you with him, to sleep in a baggage-cart, and stroll about the camp like a gipsy, with a knapsack and two children at your back; then, by way of entertainment in the evening, to make a party with the sergeant’s wife to drink bohea tea, and play at all-fours on a drum-head:—’tis a precious life, to be sure!
Lau. Nay, mamma, you shouldn’t be against my lieutenant, for I heard him say you were the best natured and best looking woman in the world.
Mrs. Bri. Why, child, I never said but that Lieutenant O’Connor was a very well-bred and discerning young man; ’tis your papa is so violent against him.
Lau. Why, Cousin Sophy married an officer.
Mrs. Bri. Ay, Laura, an officer of the militia.
Lau. No, indeed, ma’am, a marching regiment.
Mrs. Bri. No, child, I tell you he was a major of militia.
Lau. Indeed, mamma, it wasn’t.
Enter Justice Credulous.
Just. Bridget, my love, I have had a message.
Lau. It was cousin Sophy told me so.
Just. I have had a message, love——
Mrs. Bri. No, child, she would say no such thing.
Just. A message, I say.
Lau. How could he be in the militia when he was ordered abroad?
Mrs. Bri. Ay, girl, hold your tongue!—Well, my dear.
Just. I have had a message from Doctor Rosy.
Mrs. Bri. He ordered abroad! He went abroad for his health.
Just. Why, Bridget!——
Mrs. Bri. Well, deary.—Now hold your tongue, miss.
Just. A message from Dr. Rosy, and Dr. Rosy says—
Lau. I’m sure, mamma, his regimentals——
Just. Damn his regimentals!—Why don’t you listen?