`For interferin' with Tulke's amours, eh?' Tulke turned a rich sloe colour. `Oh no, you don't!' Beetle went on. `You've had your innings. We've been sent up for cursing and swearing at you, and we're goin' to be let off with a warning! Are we? Now then, you're going to catch it.'
`I -- I -- I --' Tulke began. `Don't let that young devil start jawing.'
`If you've anything to say, you must say it decently,' said Carson.
`Decently? I will. Now look here. When we went into Bideford we met this ornament of the Sixth -- is that decent enough? -- hanging about on the road with a nasty look in his eye. We didn't know then why he was so anxious to stop us, but at five minutes to four, when we were in Yeo's shop, we saw Tulke in broad daylight, with his house-cap on, kissin' an' huggin' a woman on the pavement. Is that decent enough for you?'
`I didn't -- I wasn't.'
`We saw you?' said Beetle. `And now -- I'll be decent, Carson -- you sneak back with her kisses' (not for nothing had Beetle perused the later poets) `hot on your lips and call prefects' meetings, which aren't prefects' meetings, to uphold the honour of the Sixth.' A new and heaven-cleft path opened before him that instant. `And how do we know,' he shouted -- `how do we know how many of the Sixth are mixed up in this abominable affair?'
`Yes, that's what we want to know,' said M`Turk, with simple dignity.
`We meant to come to you about it quietly, Carson, but you would have the meeting,' said Stalky sympathetically.
The Sixth were too taken aback to reply. So, carefully modelling his rhetoric on King, Beetle followed up the attack, surpassing and surprising himself.
`It -- it isn't so much the cynical immorality of the biznai, as the blatant indecency of it, that's so awful. As far as we can see, it's impossible for us to go into Bideford without runnin' up against some prefect's unwholesome amours. There's nothing to snigger over, Naughten. I don't pretend to know much about these things -- but it seems to me a chap must be pretty far dead in sin' (that was a quotation from the school Chaplain) `when he takes to embracing his paramours' (that was Hakluyt) `before all the city' (a reminiscence of Milton). `He might at least have the decency -- you're authorities on decency, I believe -- to wait till dark. But he didn't. You didn't! Oh, Tulke. You -- you incontinent little animal!'
`Here, shut up a minute. What's all this about, Tulke?' said Carson.
`I -- look here. I'm awfully sorry. I never thought Beetle would take this line.'
`Because -- you've -- no decency -- you -- thought -- I hadn't,' cried Beetle all in one breath.
`Tried to cover it all up with a conspiracy, did you?' said Stalky.
`Direct insult to all three of us,' said M`Turk. `A most filthy mind you have, Tulke.'
`I'll shove you fellows outside the door if you go on like this,' said Carson angrily.
`That proves it's a conspiracy,' said Stalky, with the air of a virgin martyr.
`I -- I was goin' along the street -- I swear I was,' cried Tulke, `and -- and I'm awfully sorry about it -- a woman came up and kissed me. I swear I didn't kiss her.'
There was a pause, filled by Stalky's long, liquid whistle of contempt, amazement, and derision.