MISTRESS FORD

He will seek there, on my word. Neither press,
coffer, chest, trunk, well, vault, but he hath an
abstract for the remembrance of such places, and
goes to them by his note: there is no hiding you in the house.

FALSTAFF

I'll go out then.

MISTRESS PAGE

If you go out in your own semblance, you die, Sir
John. Unless you go out disguised–

MISTRESS FORD

How might we disguise him?

MISTRESS PAGE

Alas the day, I know not! There is no woman's gown
big enough for him otherwise he might put on a hat,
a muffler and a kerchief, and so escape.

FALSTAFF

Good hearts, devise something: any extremity rather
than a mischief.

MISTRESS FORD

My maid's aunt, the fat woman of Brentford, has a
gown above.

MISTRESS PAGE

On my word, it will serve him; she's as big as he
is: and there's her thrummed hat and her muffler
too. Run up, Sir John.

MISTRESS FORD

Go, go, sweet Sir John: Mistress Page and I will
look some linen for your head.

MISTRESS PAGE

Quick, quick! we'll come dress you straight: put
on the gown the while.

Exit FALSTAFF

MISTRESS FORD

I would my husband would meet him in this shape: he
cannot abide the old woman of Brentford; he swears
she's a witch; forbade her my house and hath
threatened to beat her.

MISTRESS PAGE

Heaven guide him to thy husband's cudgel, and the
devil guide his cudgel afterwards!

MISTRESS FORD

But is my husband coming?