Act 4 - Scene 4
Enter LAUNCE, with his his Dog
When a man's servant shall play the cur with him,
look you, it goes hard: one that I brought up of a
that I saved from drowning, when three or
four of his blind brothers and sisters went to it.
I have taught
him, even as one would say precisely,
'thus I would teach a dog.' I was sent to deliver
him as a present
to Mistress Silvia from my master;
and I came no sooner into the dining-chamber but he
steps me to her
trencher and steals her capon's leg:
O, 'tis a foul thing when a cur cannot keep himself
in all companies!
I would have, as one should say,
one that takes upon him to be a dog indeed, to be,
as it were, a dog
at all things. If I had not had
more wit than he, to take a fault upon me that he did,
I think verily he had
been hanged for't; sure as I
live, he had suffered for't; you shall judge. He
thrusts me himself into the company
of three or four
gentlemanlike dogs under the duke's table: he had
not been therebless the mark!a pissing
all the chamber smelt him. 'Out with the dog!' says
one: 'What cur is that?' says another: 'Whip
out' says the third: 'Hang him up' says the duke.
I, having been acquainted with the smell before,
was Crab, and goes me to the fellow that
whips the dogs: 'Friend,' quoth I, 'you mean to whip
the dog?' 'Ay,
marry, do I,' quoth he. 'You do him
the more wrong,' quoth I; ''twas I did the thing you
wot of.' He makes
me no more ado, but whips me out
of the chamber. How many masters would do this for
Nay, I'll be sworn, I have sat in the
stocks for puddings he hath stolen, otherwise he had
been executed; I
have stood on the pillory for geese
he hath killed, otherwise he had suffered for't.
Thou thinkest not of
this now. Nay, I remember the
trick you served me when I took my leave of Madam
Silvia: did not I bid
thee still mark me and do as I
do? when didst thou see me heave up my leg and make
water against a
gentlewoman's farthingale? didst
thou ever see me do such a trick?
Enter PROTEUS and JULIA
Sebastian is thy name? I like thee well
And will employ thee in some service presently.
In what you please: I'll do what I can.
I hope thou wilt.
How now, you whoreson peasant!
Where have you been these two days loitering?
Marry, sir, I carried Mistress Silvia the dog you bade me.
And what says she to my little jewel?
Marry, she says your dog was a cur, and tells you
currish thanks is good enough for such a present.
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