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A silence would follow. Daryushka would come out of the kitchen and with an expression of blank dejection would stand in the door-way to listen, with her face propped on her fist. Eh! Mihail Averyanitch would sigh. To expect intelligence of this generation! And he would describe how wholesome, entertaining, and interesting life had been in the past. How intelligent the educated class in Russia used to be, and what lofty ideas it had of honour and friendship; how they used to lend money without an IOU, and it was thought a disgrace not to give a helping hand to a comrade in need; and what campaigns, what adventures, what skirmishes, what comrades, what women! And the Caucasus, what a marvellous country! The wife of a battalion commander, a queer woman, used to put on an officers uniform and drive off into the mountains in the evening, alone, without a guide. It was said that she had a love affair with some princeling in the native village. Queen of Heaven, Holy Mother Daryushka would sigh. And how we drank! And how we ate! And what desperate liberals we were! Andrey Yefimitch would listen without hearing; he was musing as he sipped his beer. I often dream of intellectual people and conversation with them, he said suddenly, interrupting Mihail Averyanitch. My father gave me an excellent education, but under the influence of the ideas of the sixties made me become a doctor. I believe if I had not obeyed him then, by now I should have been in the very centre of the intellectual movement. Most likely I should have become a member of some university. Of course, intellect, too, is transient and not eternal, but you know why I cherish a partiality for it. Life is a vexatious trap; when a thinking man reaches maturity and attains to full consciousness he cannot help feeling that he is in a trap from which there is no escape. Indeed, he is summoned without his choice by fortuitous circumstances from non-existence into life what for? He tries to find out the meaning and object of his existence; he is told nothing, or he is told absurdities; he knocks and it is not opened to him; death comes to himalso without his choice. And so, just as in prison men held together by common misfortune feel more at ease when they are together, so one does not notice the trap in life when people with a bent for analysis and generalization meet together and pass their time in the interchange of proud and free ideas. In that sense the intellect is the source of an enjoyment nothing can replace. Perfectly true. Not looking his friend in the face, Andrey Yefimitch would go on, quietly and with pauses, talking about intellectual people and conversation with them, and Mihail Averyanitch would listen attentively and agree: Perfectly true. And you do not believe in the immortality of the soul? he would ask suddenly. No, honoured Mihail Averyanitch; I do not believe it, and have no grounds for believing it. I must own I doubt it too. And yet I have a feeling as though I should never die. Oh, I think to myself: Old fogey, it is time you were dead! But there is a little voice in my soul says: Dont believe it; you wont die. Soon after nine oclock Mihail Averyanitch would go away. As he put on his fur coat in the entry he would say with a sigh: What a wilderness fate has carried us to, though, really! Whats most vexatious of all is to have to die here. Ech! VII After seeing his friend out Andrey Yefimitch would sit down at the table and begin reading again. The stillness of the evening, and afterwards of the night, was not broken by a single sound, and it seemed |
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