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I see, sir; she will be more likely to obey. And Harry Sir? I will call you when I want you; till then you are dispensed from lessons. He departed. Mr. Moore, left alone, rose from his desk. I can be very cool and very supercilious with Henry, he said. I can seem to make light of his apprehensions, and look down du haut de ma grandeur on his youthful ardour. To him I can speak as if, in my eyes, they were both children. Let me see if I can keep up the same rôle with her. I have known the moment when I seemed about to forget it; when Confusion and Submission seemed about to crush me with their soft tyranny; when my tongue faltered, and I have almost let the mantle drop, and stood in her presence, not masternobut something else. I trust I shall never so play the fool: it is well for a Sir Philip Nunnely to redden when he meets her eye; he may permit himself the indulgence of submission; he may even without disgrace suffer his hand to tremble when it touches hers; but if one of her farmers were to show himself susceptible and sentimental, he would merely prove his need of a strait waistcoat. So far I have always done very well. She has sat near me, and I have not shakenmore than my desk. I have encountered her looks and smiles likewhy, like a tutor, as I am. Her hand I never yet touchednever underwent that test. Her farmer or her footman I am notno serf nor servant of hers have I ever been; but I am poor, and it behoves me to look to my self-respectnot to compromise an inch of it. What did she mean by that allusion to the cold people who petrify flesh to marble? It pleased meI hardly know whyI would not permit myself to inquireI never do indulge in scrutiny either of her language or countenance; for if I did, I should sometimes forget Common-sense and believe in Romance. A strange, secret ecstasy steals through my veins at moments; Ill not encourageIll not remember it. I am resolved, as long as may be, to retain the right to say with Paul: I am not mad, but speak forth the words of truth and soberness. He pausedlistening. Will she come, or will she not come? he inquired. How will she take the message? naïvely or disdainfully? like a child or like a queen? Both characters are in her nature. If she comes, what shall I say to her? How account, firstly, for the freedom of the request? Shall I apologize to her? I could in all humility; but would an apology tend to place us in the positions we ought relatively to occupy in this matter? I must keep up the professor, otherwiseI hear a door He waited. Many minutes passed. She will refuse me. Henry is entreating her to come; she declines. My petition is presumption in her eyes; let her only come, I can teach her to the contrary. I would rather she were a little perverse; it will steel me. I prefer her cuirassed in pride, armed with a taunt. Her scorn startles me from my dreams; I stand up myself. A sarcasm from her eyes or lips puts strength into every nerve and sinew I have. Some step approaches, and not Henrys The door unclosed; Miss Keeldar came in. The message, it appeared, had found her at her needle; she brought her work in her hand. That day she had not been riding out; she had evidently passed it quietly. She wore her neat indoor dress and silk apron. This was no Thalestris from the fields, but a quiet domestic character from the fireside. Mr. Moore had her at advantage; he should have addressed her at once in solemn accents, and with rigid mien. Perhaps he would, had she looked saucy; but her air never showed less of crâniere. A soft kind of youthful shyness depressed her eyelid and mantled on her cheek. The tutor stood silent. She made a full stop between the door and his desk. |
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