Ah! here was Alfred. Having stolen in unobserved, he playfully leaned on the back of Sophronia’s chair, and, as Miss Podsnap saw him, put one of Sophronia’s wandering locks to his lips, and waved a kiss from it towards Miss Podsnap.

“What is this about husbands and detestations?” inquired the captivating Alfred.

“Why, they say,” returned his wife, “that listeners never hear any good of themselves; though you — but pray how long have you been here, sir?”

“This instant arrived, my own.”

“Then I may go on — though if you had been here but a moment or two sooner, you would have heard your praises sounded by Georgiana.”

“Only, if they were to be called praises at all which I really don’t think they were,” explained Miss Podsnap in a flutter, “for being so devoted to Sophronia.”

“Sophronia!” murmured Alfred. “My life!” and kissed her hand. In return for which she kissed his watch- chain.

“But it was not I who was to be taken away and trampled upon, I hope?” said Alfred, drawing a seat between them.

“Ask Georgiana, my soul,” replied his wife.

Alfred touchingly appealed to Georgiana.

“Oh, it was nobody,” replied Miss Podsnap. “It was nonsense.”

“But if you are determined to know, Mr. Inquisitive Pet, as I suppose you are,” said the happy and fond Sophronia, smiling, “it was any one who should venture to aspire to Georgiana.”

“Sophronia, my love,” remonstrated Mr. Lammle, becoming graver, “you are not serious?”

“Alfred, my love,” returned his wife, “I dare say Georgiana was not, but I am.”

“Now this,” said Mr. Lammle, “shows the accidental combinations that there are in things! Could you believe, my Ownest, that I came in here with the name of an aspirant to our Georgiana on my lips?”

“Of course I could believe, Alfred,” said Mrs. Lammle, “anything that you told me.”

“You dear one! And I anything that you told me.”

How delightful those interchanges, and the looks accompanying them! Now, if the skeleton up-stairs had taken that opportunity, for instance, of calling out “Here I am, suffocating in the closet!”

“I give you my honor, my dear Sophronia—”

“And I know what that is, love,” said she.

“You do, my darling — that I came into the room all but uttering young Fledgeby’s name. Tell Georgiana, dearest, about young Fledgeby.”

“Oh no, don’t! Please don’t!” cried Miss Podsnap, putting her fingers in her ears. “I’d rather not.”