The Crooked Man

One summer night, a few months after my marriage, I was seated by my own hearth smoking a last pipe and nodding over a novel, for my day’s work had been an exhausting one. My wife had already gone upstairs, and the sound of the locking of the hall door some time before told me that the servants had also retired. I had risen from my seat and was knocking out the ashes of my pipe, when I suddenly heard the clang of the bell.

I looked at the clock. It was a quarter to twelve. This could not be a visitor at so late an hour. A patient, evidently, and possibly an all-night sitting. With a wry face I went out into the hall and opened the door. To my astonishment, it was Sherlock Holmes who stood upon my step.

‘Ah, Watson,’ said he, ‘I hoped that I might not be too late to catch you.’

‘My dear fellow, pray come in.’

‘You look surprised, and no wonder! Relieved, too, I fancy! Hum! you still smoke the Arcadia mixture of your bachelor days, then! There’s no mistaking that fluffy ash upon your coat. It’s easy to tell that you’ve been accustomed to wear a uniform, Watson; you’ll never pass as a purebred civilian as long as you keep that habit of carrying your handkerchief in your sleeve. Could you put me up to-night?’

‘With pleasure.’

‘You told me that you had bachelor quarters for one, and I see that you have no gentleman visitor at present. Your hat-stand proclaims as much.’

‘I shall be delighted if you will stay.’

‘Thank you. I’ll fill a vacant peg, then. Sorry to see that you’ve had the British workman in the house. He’s a token of evil. Not the drains, I hope?’

‘No, the gas.’

‘Ah! He has left two nail marks from his boot upon your linoleum just where the light strikes it. No, thank you, I had some supper at Waterloo, but I’ll smoke a pipe with you with pleasure.’

I handed him my pouch, and he seated himself opposite to me, and smoked for some time in silence. I was well aware that nothing but business of importance could have brought him to me at such an hour, so I waited patiently until he should come round to it.

‘I see that you are professionally rather busy just now,’ said he, glancing very keenly across at me.

‘Yes, I’ve had a busy day,’ I answered. ‘It may seem very foolish in your eyes,’ I added, ‘but really I don’t know how you deduced it.’

Holmes chuckled to himself.

‘I have the advantage of knowing your habits, my dear Watson,’ said he. ‘When your round is a short one you walk, and when it is a long one you use a hansom. As I perceive that your boots, although used, are by no means dirty, I cannot doubt that you are at present busy enough to justify the hansom.’

‘Excellent!’ I cried.

‘Elementary,’ said he. ‘It is one of those instances where the reasoner can produce an effect which seems remarkable to his neighbour, because the latter has missed the one little point which is the basis of the deduction. The same may be said, my dear fellow, for the effect of some of these little sketches of yours, which is entirely meretricious, depending as it does upon your retaining in your own hands some factors in the problem which are never imparted to the reader. Now, at present I am in the position of

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