As the ancients agree, brother Toby, said my father, that there are two different and distinct kinds of love, according to the different parts which are affected by itthe Brain or LiverI think when a man is in love, it behoves him a little to consider which of the two he is fallen into.
What signifies it, brother Shandy, replied my uncle Toby, which of the two it is, provided it will but make a man marry, and love his wife, and get a few children?
A few children! cried my father, rising out of his chair, and looking full in my mothers face, as he forced his way betwixt hers and doctor Slopsa few children! cried my father, repeating my uncle Tobys words as he walkd to and fro
Not, my dear brother Toby, cried my father, recovering himself all at once, and coming close up to the back of my uncle Tobys chairnot that I should be sorry hadst thou a scoreon the contrary, I should rejoiceand be as kind, Toby, to every one of them as a father
My uncle Toby stole his hand unperceived behind his chair, to give my fathers a squeeze
Nay, moreover, continued he, keeping hold of my uncle Tobys handso much dost thou possess, my dear Toby, of the milk of human nature, and so little of its asperitiestis piteous the world is not peopled by creatures which resemble thee; and was I an Asiatic monarch, added my father, heating himself with his new projectI would oblige thee, provided it would not impair thy strengthor dry up thy radical moisture too fast or weaken thy memory or fancy, brother Toby, which these gymnics inordinately taken are apt to doelse, dear Toby, I would procure thee the most beautiful woman in my empire, and I would oblige thee, nolens, volens, to beget for me one subject every month
As my father pronounced the last word of the sentencemy mother took a pinch of snuff.
Now I would not, quoth my uncle Toby, get a child, nolens, volens, that is, whether I would or no, to please the greatest prince upon earth
And twould be cruel in me, brother Toby, to compel thee; said my father- -but tis a case put to shew thee, that it is not thy begetting a childin case thou shouldst be ablebut the system of Love and Marriage thou goest upon, which I would set thee right in
There is at least, said Yorick, a great deal of reason and plain sense in captain Shandys opinion of love; and tis amongst the ill-spent hours of my life, which I have to answer for, that I have read so many flourishing poets and rhetoricians in my time, from whom I never could extract so much- -
I wish, Yorick, said my father, you had read Plato; for there you would have learnt that there are two LovesI know there were two Religions, replied Yorick, amongst the ancientsonefor the vulgar, and another for the learned;but I think One Love might have served both of them very well
I could not; replied my fatherand for the same reasons: for of these Loves, according to Ficinuss comment upon Velasius, the one is rational
the other is naturalthe first ancientwithout motherwhere Venus had nothing to do: the second, begotten of Jupiter and Dione
Pray, brother, quoth my uncle Toby, what has a man who believes in God to do with this? My father could not stop to answer, for fear of breaking the thread of his discourse
This latter, continued he, partakes wholly of the nature of Venus.
The first, which is the golden chain let down from heaven, excites to love heroic, which comprehends in it, and excites to the desire of philosophy and truththe second, excites to desire, simply
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