`But what good was it to the young men afterwards?'

`Why, don't you see?' replied Mein Herr. `They became teachers in their turn, and they said all these things over again; and their pupils wrote it all down; and the Examiners accepted it; and nobody had the ghost of an idea what it all meant!'

`And how did it end?'

`It ended this way. We woke up one fine day, and found there was no one in the place that knew anything about Moral Philosophy. So we abolished it, teachers, classes, examiners, and all. And if any one wanted to learn anything about it, he had to make it out for himself; and after another twenty years or so there were several men that really knew something about it! Now tell me another thing. How long do you teach a youth before you examine him, in your Universities?'

I told him, three or four years.

`Just so, just what we did!' he exclaimed. `We taught 'em a bit, and, just as they were beginning to take it in, we took it all out again! We pumped our wells dry before they were a quarter full--we stripped our orchards while the apples were still in blossom--we applied the severe logic of arithmetic to our chickens, while peacefully slumbering in their shells! Doubtless it's the early bird that picks up the worm--but if the bird gets up so outrageously early that the worm is still deep underground, what then is its chance of a breakfast?'

Not much, I admitted.

`Now see how that works!' he went on eagerly. `If you want to pump your wells so soon--and I suppose you tell me that is what you must do?'

`We must,' I said. `In an over-crowded country like this, nothing but Competitive Examinations--'

Mein Herr threw up his hands wildly. `What, again?' he cried. `I thought it was dead, fifty years ago! Oh this Upas tree of Competitive Examinations! Beneath whose deadly shade all the original genius, all the exhaustive research, all the untiring life-long diligence by which our fore-fathers have so advanced human knowledge, must slowly but surely wither away, and give place to a system of Cookery, in which the human mind is a sausage, and all we ask is, how much indigestible stuff can be crammed into it!'

Always, after these bursts of eloquence, he seemed to forget himself for a moment, and only to hold on to the thread of thought by some single word. `Yes, crammed,' he repeated. `We went through all that stage of the disease--had it bad, I warrant you! Of course, as the Examination was all in all, we tried to put in just what was wanted--and the great thing to aim at was, that the Candidate should know absolutely nothing beyond the needs of the Examination! I don't say it was ever quite achieved: but one of my own pupils (pardon an old man's egotism) came very near it. After the Examination, he mentioned to me the few facts which he knew but had not been able to bring in, and I can assure you they were trivial, Sir, absolutely trivial!'

I feebly expressed my surprise and delight.

The old man bowed, with a gratified smile, and proceeded. `At that time, no one had hit on the much more rational plan of watching for the individual scintillations of genius, and rewarding them as they occurred. As it was, we made our unfortunate pupil into a Leyden-jar, charged him up to the eyelids-- then applied the knob of a Competitive Examination, and drew off one magnificent spark, which very often cracked the jar! What mattered that? We labeled it "First Class Spark", and put it away on the shelf.'

`But the more rational system--?' I suggested.